The Orange Walk (well, one of them)

Perambulating in an easterly direction on the north footpath of Shettleston Rd, Glasgow, what do I hear?  Yes, the start of the band season in the form of moving muppets with rubber legs trying to keep tune with the 'music'
Good stuff though I must admit, although I couldn't imagine it stirring the hearts of thousands to go to war for King and Country, even less to go the 'workplace' That's an Old English name for 'hell'
I love the individuals who pass themselves off as 'wimmin' with the weans following the circus at a leisurely stroll    I love the bellowing out at the 'musicians' which we call 'verbal intercourse' in other words 'talking'
'Haw youse, JIMMY!!  Youse wi'the big drum...gies a light for ma fag son'
'Naw hen, ah'm, too bizzy bangin' the skins ya wee bampot'
'Well throw your f-----g lighter then................NOW!!!!!!!!!
Senga eventually got her fag lit from a flying fist from 'Wee Alfie' the flute player.
I remember it used to be prams with the kids esconced therein that followed the band, nowadays it's more upmarket with Asda trolleys.  Life is so much easier for them, just dump the kids and then the trollies, or dump the kids and keep the trollies for next year's batch.

Bye Mae Looves

Marks and Spencer

Ambling along in aisle three with a punnet of raspberries I approach the checkout. The cashier enquires:-

'Bag for life sir?'

'Er, no, I'm already married, thanks for the offer though'

Bye Mae Looves

Talk Sport....as on radio

Driving east on the M8 motorway and disposed to listen to innate chat on the above named dork sponsored channel 'Talk Sport'  The following linguistic artistry is atypical of the highly paid 'presenters'

Keyes..Hi Andy..hahahahahahahahahaha

Andy....Hey..hahahahahaha

Keyes..well, talk about that football game what?? hahahahahahahahahaha

Andy..Aye....hahahahahahaha

Keyes..hahahahahahahaha

Andy..hahahahaha

Keyes..We have in the studio Harry Redknapp..hahahahahaha...welcome Harry..hahahahaha

Harry..hahahahaha

Andy..hahahahaha

Keyes..hahahahaha

Andy..hahahahaha

Harry..hahahahaha